Sunday, November 20, 2011
So Called Tragedy My Triumph
I'm so proud to say that I'm at a point in my life where the things that people say that seem to cut through the soul don't mess up my entire day or my entire life! In saying that I am still human and always will be so some things do bother me but I don't let these things throw me off the course of my life's road that I so happily and contently travel currently! As I recall back to the time when I came back home with my son in my belly at the end of my first trimester and would hear from family and people who didn't know me say things that any woman with her unborn blessing in her womb shouldn't have to hear! We live in a world that strives to be something that it and the people in it will never obtain, perfection! I feel sorry for the souls that go around everyday thinking that they can or will one day be perfect! When my son was conceived it was through a tremendous amount of love that most babies don't even get the to chance to experience. I love that god considered me to be worthy enough to birth a child on my own without his father and not knowing at the time I would one day become strong enough to be the mother he needed me to be! What motherhood teaches me is absolutely jaw dropping and beautiful on so many levels! I never would've known before becoming a mother that this baby would be my teacher in life before he even began to speak words and how motherhood constantly gives me a test for my human strength and decision making. I can honestly say that every year my mindset and attitude improves in ways that back when I was 21 or even 26 when I gave birth to my son never thought it would be possible for me to change! As I gladly approach 30 and three years into motherhood I just wonder what else this little teacher is going to teach his mommy and how much like me he is but on a more advanced scale! In my opinion, no matter what people say about single motherhood, I do feel that it is challenging but it's also what you make it and if you choose to embrace all of the wonderful pleasures of being a mother it can be one of the best gifts god could ever give a woman! Most people say that it's tragic for a child to be brought up in a household with no father, but the true tragedy is when that child's father has some serious issues to where he tears that child down before he or she even has the chance to get a feel for the beautiful things that life has to offer! I'm am so happy to say that I was strong enough to not allow this to happen to my son and when dealing with people who are on the outside looking in have no idea how deep a situation like that can ruin the beauty and innocence that god instills in a child at conception can ruin that child forever!! So in that regard I feel that I have triumphed, because I didn't let my sons father tear him down! Now my son has every right to be the child and person he wants to be without someone tearing him down right at the time when he should have every full right to be who god intended for him to be!