Friday, December 30, 2011
Wow, my people 2011 is almost over and a new year is now approaching ever so quickly! When I take a moment and sit and think about how fast this year has come and gone I start thinking about all the things that I did that I was proud of and the things I was not so proud of! I will say that most of the events that occurred sure taught me something that I will never forget and I am glad to say that God still loves me enough to allow me more time here on earth. More time on earth for me means more time to learn, to love, to grow, to teach, to succeed, to fail, to be thankful, to dream, to mature, to raise my son, to accomplish my goals, to help others and to enjoy life to the fullest! I have to say this year was great, because it was actually the first year for me that I literally took the time to seriously reflect on every decision I made and the outcomes of those decisions! The mistakes that I made I plan on not making again and I plan to continue to work on my patience, because my impatience caused me to make some decisions I seriously wish I hadn't! The great thing about life is that what it teaches us is absolutely awesome depending on how you view the lessons that are being brought to your chalkboard! I told myself that next year will be even better, because of my mind set and plans that I have for my life. No more unnecessary relationships with people that have no purpose for me and my life, no more hasty decision making, no more impatience, no more procrastinating and no more waiting to live the the life I want for me and my son, because it starts now!! I will no longer limit and deprive myself of the wonderful things life has to offer me! Be optimistic, be focused on your dreams and goals and fall in love with yourself all over again so you can be you fully with no limits and as always stay busy loving you! HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE! IT'S GOING TO BE A GREAT ONE, BUT REMEMBER THAT IS ENTIRELY UP TO YOU! PEACE AND GOD BLESS!!!!
Monday, December 19, 2011
It seems that love now a days lasts about 30 minutes and no one is in it for the long haul! The things that should be important are not a priority, while honesty, being faithful, caring, considerate, and sincere are almost nonexistent when it comes to most people! Every man for himself seems to be a lot of peoples attitude, while the people that possess these qualities appear to be dwindling down! One of the many things I enjoy doing in my spare time is watching old black and white classic films back when things were so much different when it came to love and the way men and women conducted themselves. I'd sit and watch these films thinking to myself saying, "What happen to men like that and where did they go?" I like how gentle, thoughtful, loving, caring and hard working the men were back then! Of course, they weren't all like that but it seemed that at least half of men had these qualities and that was the way of life back in those days. Men and woman of today aren't as fortunate unless they have someone in their life that have what I like to call that old school flavor running in their blood or these men and women just so happen to have inherited it! I was raised mostly by my grandparents in my younger years so all of the advice they gave me stuck with me. When I chose to talk to my grandparents about things that I experienced in life that bothered me or that I didn't understand they always had the best advice, because they had already experienced themselves! I feel that having them in my life constantly in my younger years and taking heed to their advice has a lot to do with if not mostly with my old school ways. My grandparents were married when they were in their teens and stuck it out for about fifty years which is almost unheard of these days! I believe being who you need to be for yourself first and being patient plays a big role in having a long lasting love with your one and only! Most people, including myself, have made the mistake in choosing the wrong person to love and most have also made the mistake in giving too many people their love which unfortunately has left them so heartbroken that they feel that they have no more love to give! I was having a conversation with one of my best friends and we were talking about relationships and he asked me if I have ever given my all in a relationship and I replied NO! I explained to him that the reason for this was, because I always knew that I would be married one day and my husband would be the one to get all my love in every way not some man that I wasn't sure was the one! There has always been something about me even as a little girl that was different and something was guiding me in the direction that I needed to go and all I had to do was listen! As I got older I started to listen to that guide and started thinking about the kind of man I needed in my life and when I figured it out I refused to settled for less! In other words, that 30 minute love of today just won't do for me and I plan to happily and patiently wait for the love I desire and deserve! Life is too short to be with someone who doesn't appreciate, love and deserve you!
Saturday, December 10, 2011
We as people have more strength than we think we do. I feel that we as people also don't give ourselves enough credit when it comes to being able to go through situations that we think will kill us if we don't get through it within five minutes! I don't too much care for setbacks personally, but the harsh reality is that life is full of them and if it wasn't for setbacks then the strength that is needed to get through life won't be obtained! Strength is so important to have in this life to where it seems it is as important as the air we breath! I have been through so much and I can honestly say that I have not been through hell and back! When I read about this place called hell I think, "Man this is a really jacked up place that I would hate to spend eternity especially with what I already had to go through on earth!!!!" People, of course, exaggerate to the fifth degree when they say they have been through hell on earth and I understand that it may feel that way for a moment especially when that individual was literally in an accident that involved fire! It is a beautiful thing when you can say that you have been through some times that were tough but you are still here and your strength level has been kicked up a few notches which has just simply prepared you for more of life's difficulties that may lie ahead! I had the opportunity to listen to a sermon a few months ago at a church where my cousins baptism was held and this preacher said that he knows that we all have been through some things and that we still had a lot to be thankful for because we are still here! I thought to myself how right this man was and how at that very minute what he said triggered something within me that kicked my strength level up even more and how grateful I am for my life and the things I've been through because I'm a much stronger woman because of them!! I learned to be grateful for setbacks and tough times, because they teach something that no one else can teach you, which is how great your own personal strength is! I believe that God did something amazing when he created us ,because we are some awesome creatures that have this amazing ability to bounce back from tragedy when it strikes! What deeply saddens me is that so many people don't realize that most of us were born with this ability and I am speaking specifically about those of us that have our right minds! So for those of us that recognize our strength I hope and pray that we continue to grow strong together, those of us that don't have the strength that is needed please don't give up and fight for it!!
Sunday, November 20, 2011
I'm so proud to say that I'm at a point in my life where the things that people say that seem to cut through the soul don't mess up my entire day or my entire life! In saying that I am still human and always will be so some things do bother me but I don't let these things throw me off the course of my life's road that I so happily and contently travel currently! As I recall back to the time when I came back home with my son in my belly at the end of my first trimester and would hear from family and people who didn't know me say things that any woman with her unborn blessing in her womb shouldn't have to hear! We live in a world that strives to be something that it and the people in it will never obtain, perfection! I feel sorry for the souls that go around everyday thinking that they can or will one day be perfect! When my son was conceived it was through a tremendous amount of love that most babies don't even get the to chance to experience. I love that god considered me to be worthy enough to birth a child on my own without his father and not knowing at the time I would one day become strong enough to be the mother he needed me to be! What motherhood teaches me is absolutely jaw dropping and beautiful on so many levels! I never would've known before becoming a mother that this baby would be my teacher in life before he even began to speak words and how motherhood constantly gives me a test for my human strength and decision making. I can honestly say that every year my mindset and attitude improves in ways that back when I was 21 or even 26 when I gave birth to my son never thought it would be possible for me to change! As I gladly approach 30 and three years into motherhood I just wonder what else this little teacher is going to teach his mommy and how much like me he is but on a more advanced scale! In my opinion, no matter what people say about single motherhood, I do feel that it is challenging but it's also what you make it and if you choose to embrace all of the wonderful pleasures of being a mother it can be one of the best gifts god could ever give a woman! Most people say that it's tragic for a child to be brought up in a household with no father, but the true tragedy is when that child's father has some serious issues to where he tears that child down before he or she even has the chance to get a feel for the beautiful things that life has to offer! I'm am so happy to say that I was strong enough to not allow this to happen to my son and when dealing with people who are on the outside looking in have no idea how deep a situation like that can ruin the beauty and innocence that god instills in a child at conception can ruin that child forever!! So in that regard I feel that I have triumphed, because I didn't let my sons father tear him down! Now my son has every right to be the child and person he wants to be without someone tearing him down right at the time when he should have every full right to be who god intended for him to be!
Sunday, November 13, 2011
When I sit and think about all the people in my life at the current time it makes me smile! I have a three year old son who is absolutely beautiful and I feel blessed on such a great level to have him in my life! My son is a great baby and when he makes me upset he immediately does something to make me laugh and I don't even try to hold back, because I'm thinking "What's the point, laugh and let it out?" I could go on and on about him but I want to include others that have a profound affect on my life as well! My mother, Oh boy, she is loud, rambunctious, funny and has the biggest heart when it comes to her family! She will do anything for her family no matter what is said about her she is the type of person that will give you her last and not care as long as you're okay and have what you need! She loves to see others happy and has such a beautiful giving spirit that I have to say that she and I fortunately were blessed with! My grandmother, god rest her soul, had this same spirit and instilled it within my mother and I and she was our families rock! My grandmother was remarkable in so many ways that it would take weeks upon weeks to describe her or months and sundays as she would say! She sacrificed and gave so much that it would make you stop and wonder if she ever know how remarkable and beautiful she was! My brother, who is so distant, took it upon himself to become my guardian when I was seventeen years old, because he wanted me to have a chance at a better life! He didn't have to do that and he could've just went his on way to start his life not giving a care about all of us back home when he graduated from college back in 1997! I will always remember that and what a beautiful person he is and what a beautiful mind he has! I wish I had the focus and drive that my brother has, because it is down right awesome and keep up the excellent work! My grandfather is so intelligent and stubborn, which makes having a relationship with him difficult! No matter how stubborn my grandfather is he's still so awesome in so many ways! Not many people have the will and drive to self educate themselves on the level that he has! I love that fact that everyday he has to make it a priority to learn something that he didn't know the day before and what he knows will make anyone envious of the knowledge that he has obtained over the years! My cousin, who is currently going through a through a rough test right now, has truly taught me something! No matter what happens to you in life you are still here, which means that whatever your going through couldn't be that bad because your still here! My cousin has one the sweetest, toughest and coolest souls I know! Last but not least my best friends and they know who they are! They have the most beautiful qualities any friends could have! They are hilarious, strong, gifted and truly blessed with gods good hands! As a matter of fact I consider my best friends family, because I don't know too many friends who would do anything for you and not complain or act funny toward you no matter what they might be going through. I am so happy and pleased to have all of these great people in my life and I don't know what I would do without them! It's hard for me to see nothing but the things I don't agree with that they may do or say, because their beauty out shines all of that! I feel that if all a person can see in you is all negative then you don't need them in your life, especially if you are a beautiful person overall! No one person is all glorious and we all some things about ourselves that we need to work on just don't let what we need to work on be your focus! Take the time to see what makes those around you beautiful and let them know it!
Wednesday, November 2, 2011
Tell me have you ever been blamed for someone else's mistake, because they chose not to be responsible? I feel that once you reach an age where you know right from wrong you have the option of choosing to do right or wrong. Now I'm not judgemental so those that choose right or wrong is that individuals human right and to be honest those of us that choose to do right still do some wrong even though we don't like to admit it! Whats dead wrong is when someone blames another for the mistakes they made! I think that is unfair and the individual that's placing blame should own up to their mistakes! It may seem like a small thing, but in all actually it's a tremendous deal! This problem can seriously ruin relationships or even keep relationships from ever blossoming! Placing blame like any other problem is not easy to stop especially if denial is present! You will definitely need the support of a higher power and your friends and family if possible. The change, of course, won't happen over night, but baby steps everyday will surely help you along the way to becoming a better you! Trust me I know, because I used to be that individual placing blame and I got sick of being that person! I knew that I could and needed to be more and recognizing that caused me to change! The woman that I envisioned myself being didn't place blame. She owned up to her responsibilities and womaned up to life! So if you desire to be a better person, whether you feel you can accomplish it or not, focus on your goal and let that be your drive to help you along the way! As always stay busy loving you and say hello to a better you!